Recent Articles

Pastor, sooner or later the call comes. Someone in your church has just lost a husband, a friend, a job. On the drive over, you think what almost everyone thinks: I don't know what to say.Most people in your church feel that way, so they do nothing. They wait for the hurting person to reach out, and that never happens. Pastors face the opposite temptation. We think we're supposed to have the words, so we fill the silence with explanations and advice.Everyone you lead will face loss, and so will you. The Bible says, “He comforts us every time we have trouble, so when others have trouble, we can comfort them with the same comfort God gives us” (2 Corinthians 1:4 NCV). Helping hurting people is part of the assignment. You're going to need this skill for the rest of your ministry. Here's how to do it when you don't have the words.Don't be afraid of tearsBefore we get to what to do, you need to see tears the way God does. You can feel sorrow because you're made in the image of a God who feels it. The Bible says the Father was grieved over human sin (Genesis 6:6). The Spirit groans with us when we pray (Romans 8:26). And when Jesus stood with the mourners after Lazarus died, the Bible says, “Jesus wept” (John 11:35 NIV).Jesus wasn't ashamed to cry in public, and the people watching understood what his tears meant: He loved his friend. Tears are a sign of love, not weakness.That matters for pastors, because we often think we have to be the strong one in the room. “I need to hold it together for them.” That's a mistake. Sympathy says, “I'm sorry you hurt.” Empathy shows, “I'm hurting with you.” A grieving person needs to see that you feel it too.And please don't tell someone to stop crying. People usually say that because tears make them uncomfortable. But feelings are meant to be felt. The Bible says, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15 ESV).God takes tears so seriously that he keeps them: “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book” (Psalm 56:8 NLT). If God counts every tear, you don't need to rush anyone past theirs.Learn from what Job's friends got rightJob lost his children, his wealth, and his health almost overnight. We usually remember his friends for what they got wrong, and once they started giving opinions, they got plenty wrong. But before they said a word, they did three things exactly right. Those three things, plus one more, give you a simple way to help anyone in deep pain.1. Don't wait. Take the initiative.The most common mistake is waiting for the hurting person to call you. They won't.Job's friends went to him. “When Job's three friends . . . heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him” (Job 2:11 NIV). They didn't wait for an invitation, and they went together.Who in your church is hurting right now that you haven't contacted because you don't know what to say? Write down that name, and reach out this week.2. Don't hold back. Let them see your tears.“When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads” (Job 2:12 NIV).Tearing robes and throwing dust were how people in that culture showed grief. You don't need to do either. But weeping is understood everywhere. People may misunderstand your words, but they won't misunderstand your tears.Job's friends didn't stand at a distance and say they were sorry. They entered his pain. That kind of empathy bonds people together.3. Don't speak. Show up and shut up.“Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words” (Job 2:13 NLT).There's nothing you can say that will take away someone's deep pain. They don't want to be cheered up, and they don't need an explanation. Remember this: The greater the pain, the fewer words you should use. That's the ministry of presence.4. Don't forget. All tears are temporary.No matter how deep the grief is today, it won't last forever. Three times the Bible promises that God will wipe away our tears (Isaiah 25:8; Revelation 7:17; Revelation 21:4). The last promise comes near the end of the Bible: “He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever” (Revelation 21:4 NLT).Hold on to that when you're sitting with someone in pain. And hold on to it when you're the one grieving.Who needs you to show up this week?Hurting people are all around you, in your church and outside it. If you care, you'll be aware. You don't need perfect words. You need to go, let them see that you are hurting with them, and say less than you think you should.So make that visit this week. Let your presence say what your words can't.

“The most important thing is that I complete my mission, the work that the Lord Jesus gave me—to tell people the Good News about God’s grace.” Acts 20:24 (NCV)Pastor, God gave you a mission. With meetings to lead, decisions to make, and another sermon to prepare, it’s easy for that mission to get crowded out of your week.Nothing matters more than this mission.The most important work in your ministry isn’t to keep every program running, finish every task, or satisfy every expectation. Those responsibilities matter, but they must serve the mission Jesus gave you: telling people the Good News of God’s grace.Paul said, “The most important thing is that I complete my mission, the work that the Lord Jesus gave me—to tell people the Good News about God’s grace” (Acts 20:24 NCV).Jesus died on the cross to bring grace to you and to give you a mission. Part of your mission is to tell other people about the Good News of God’s grace. You came to faith in Christ because someone told you about Jesus. Now who are you going to tell?Jesus died for every single person in your community and around the world. Many people go through life without knowing what he did for them. Some live near your church. Some are people you see every week. They need to hear about his grace.Because God cares about every single person on the planet, we must too. Because God showed grace to us when he saved us, we must tell other people about the amazing grace of God. They can have a relationship with God and an eternal home in heaven.This week, ask God to help you share that Good News with one person.It’s our mission!

Pastor, people need to hear the truth. They also need to see the life God is calling them to live. I want my preaching to build people and help them believe they can take the next step.The Bible says, “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ” (Ephesians 4:15 NIV).Speaking the truth in love means telling people what they need to hear for their growth and caring about them as we say it. Kindness gives people what they need, not what they deserve. In preaching, that means challenging people and correcting them with their growth in mind.Give people a personal challengePaul writes, “I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received” (Ephesians 4:1 NIV). He is challenging believers to make their lives count. We all need a cause or purpose that calls forth the best in us. Preach toward a cause bigger than self-interest. Call people to use their strengths to serve others and make their lives count. Challenge the best in them, then give them a clear next step.Give people confidenceWhen somebody believes in you, it brings out the best in you. Jesus gave Simon a new name and told him what he could become. Simon was impulsive, but Jesus saw his potential.People need encouragement. Our words can reinforce labels they already carry, or point them toward what God can develop in them. Help them see their potential and take a next faithful step.Give people honest counselThere is no progress without learning, and no learning without feedback. Proverbs says, “People learn from one another, just as iron sharpens iron” (Proverbs 27:17 GNT). People need someone who cares enough to tell them the truth, even when it hurts. When correction is needed, name it plainly.Aim to help a person change without condemning them. Affirm the person and correct the behavior. Speak the truth in love. That kind of correction can build people up.As you prepare this week, think of one person who needs a challenge, encouragement, or honest correction. Ask how your words can help that person grow. Build people up with kindness. Speak the truth in love.

“Find a quiet, secluded place so you won’t be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace.” Matthew 6:6 (MSG)Pastor, by Monday morning, you may already be thinking about next Sunday’s sermon. Your phone already has messages waiting, and someone needs you to make a decision. Finding a few quiet minutes can feel like one more task you’re behind on.But look at Jesus’ invitation above. He asks you to come honestly, without playing a part. You don’t have to arrive with a lesson prepared or something helpful to say. You can tell God what’s really going on with you.You spend much of your week helping other people know him. He wants time with you, too.That can be easy to forget when every open moment fills with sound. You listen to a podcast in the car. You check your phone between appointments. Even when you’re alone, someone else’s words keep coming.There’s nothing wrong with listening and learning. But leave some room to listen to God. The sermon you’re studying won’t take the place of bringing your own heart to him.You may not have a quiet office or an uninterrupted morning. Could you close the door for a few minutes before returning calls? Or take a short walk and leave your phone behind?The point is to meet with God. Tell him what you’re carrying. Give your attention to his Word. Let there be a little silence without rushing to fill it.Before you open the next message today, take a few quiet minutes with him. You have people to care for this week, and your Father welcomes you into his care.