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4 Types of People Every Pastor Needs in His Life

Ministry isn’t meant to be a solo endeavor. Unfortunately, for many pastors, it is. A 2011 LifeWay Research survey said half of pastors in the United States experience loneliness in ministry. Lonely ministry contradicts how God wired the universe. We need each other. You’ll find the phrase “one another” 58 times in the New Testament. We’re to love one another, care for one another, pray for one another, etc. Those references aren’t just for lay people. All of us—especially those in ministry—need other people to help us do what God called us to do. Remember, even the Lone Ranger had Tonto! You weren’t meant to do ministry on your own. I wouldn’t be where I am in ministry without the help of others. For example, mentors have played an incredibly important role in my life. When I first moved to Orange County 33 years ago, Ray Ortland—from nearby Mariners Church—played a crucial role in my life. There were other mentors in my life before that. And I’ve been able to mentor many young pastors during my ministry. In fact, mentoring is a driving focus of what I do these days. You are well aware that pastoring is a lot more complex than most people think it is. Pastoring is more than preparing a sermon. Pastoring is being an example in speech, life, love, faith and purity. The fastest way to help someone grow spiritually isn’t giving them information. It’s showing people how to live in a way that honors Jesus. You can’t learn pastoring like that just from seminary. You need mentors—you need other people to be your example, too! But you don’t just need mentors. All of us in ministry need four different kinds of relationships.
  1. You need role models. Some of your role models may be dead! In other words, you need to identify people who have served faithfully in ministry and finished well. For instance, my role models have been people like William Wilberforce, John Wesley, General William Booth and D.L. Moody—among others. They are great guys to learn about ministry from—through what they’ve written and what others have written about them.
  2. You need co-workers. You may not have anyone else with you on staff, but you need other people to help you with the work of ministry. It can be staff or lay volunteers, but they are crucial. As a pastor, your job isn’t to do ministry—but to equip the saints for the work of the ministry. You can’t do all the ministry God has called your church to do on your own.
  3. You need friends. You also need people you can confide in—people who care about you and your ministry. I suggest you have some other pastors in your life as friends because they can better understand your world.
  4. You need mentors. And as I mentioned, you need people you can learn from in ministry. These are people who are further along in ministry—but they don’t need to be much further. Six months further will be helpful to you.

Recent Articles

The Pastor’s Guide to Difficult Personalities

The Pastor’s Guide to Difficult Personalities

By Rick WarrenMinistry would be easy if it weren’t for the people!But as every pastor knows, one of the greatest challenges in ministry is dealing with difficult people. They come in all shapes and sizes, but they have one thing in common: They drain your energy, distract your focus, and derail your momentum.Jesus had to deal with difficult people throughout his ministry. And if you’re going to follow his example, you need to learn how to deal with them too.Here are four practical strategies Jesus modeled for handling difficult people.1. Realize You Can’t Please Everyone"By myself I can do nothing. . . . I seek not to please myself but him who sent me" (John 5:30 NIV).Even God doesn’t please everyone. One person prays for rain, another for sunshine. You’re not God—and you’re not called to be a people-pleaser. Your job is to please the Lord.If you let other people’s demands drive your decisions, you’ll burn out fast. Instead, stay focused on God’s calling for your life and ministry.2. Refuse to Play Their Game"But Jesus knew their evil motives. 'You hypocrites!' he said. 'Why are you trying to trap me?'" (Matthew 22:18 NLT).Difficult people often try to manipulate you with guilt, fear, or anger. But Jesus never fell for their traps. He responded with wisdom, truth, and clarity.You don’t have to meet every expectation. You can say no. And when correction is needed, speak the truth in love. Some people aren’t interested in solutions—they just want to argue. Don’t get caught in their game.3. Don’t Retaliate"You have heard the law that says the punishment must match the injury. . . . But I say, do not resist an evil person! If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also" (Matthew 5:38-39 NLT).Retaliation gives up control. When you strike back, you’re no longer responding—you’re reacting. And that means you’re letting someone else set the tone for your life.Instead, take the high road. Respond with humility, patience, and grace. That doesn’t mean you never set boundaries—it means you do it with the right spirit.4. Pray for Them"But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you!" (Matthew 5:44 NLT).Prayer is the game-changer. You can’t change a troublemaker by ignoring them, retaliating, or giving in. But when you team up love and prayer, you create space for God to work a miracle. That’s what Jesus did—and it’s what he calls you to do too.Difficult People Come in Many FormsYou’ve likely encountered these personalities in your church:The Sherman Tank – Runs over anyone who disagreesThe Megaphone – Dominates every conversationThe Bubble Buster – Deflates every new ideaThe Volcano – Explodes with angerThe Crybaby – Constantly complains and poutsThe Nitpicker – Obsesses over minor flawsThe Space Cadet – Lives in a different realityYou may not be able to avoid these personalities, but you can learn to respond with wisdom, grace, and strength.Make this your goal: "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone" (Romans 12:18 NIV).You won’t always get it right. But as you grow in these Christ-like responses, you’ll free up energy for what really matters: shepherding the flock God has entrusted to you.
Five Ways to Lead Your Church Toward Unity

Five Ways to Lead Your Church Toward Unity

By Rick WarrenPastor, few things weigh heavier on your heart than seeing conflict among your people. Nothing breaks a shepherd's heart like watching the sheep squabble. Unity isn't just a nice bonus for your church; it's essential. In fact, Jesus taught that your church's witness depends on it. God can work through many weaknesses in your church, but he won't work through disunity.As you shepherd your people toward unity, here are five principles to guide you:1. Maintain an attitude of acceptance.Don’t major in minors. Not every issue requires total agreement. Some disagreements are simply over disputable matters. Paul addresses this in Romans 14:1-23, using the example of disagreement over dietary guidelines to remind believers not to let minor differences divide them. Instead, maintain an attitude of acceptance.Isn't it a blessing that God made us different? He loves variety! When conflict arises, your first task is to discern whether it's over essentials or non-essentials. If it's essential, address it biblically. But if it's not, lead your people to accept one another's differences.2. Focus on your common mission.Nothing unites a church more than a shared purpose. That’s why at Saddleback we always insisted that every new member go through our membership class. There, we clearly lay out the church’s purpose and direction.Your church isn’t the only church in town, and that’s okay. Other Bible-believing churches may do things differently. Make sure people know what your church is about before they join. Clarity upfront can prevent division later.3. Control your tongue.Pastor, when gossip shows up, you need to shut it down immediately—and train your leaders to do the same. Gossip is sin. When you listen to it, you become complicit. Ephesians 4:29 says, “Don’t say anything that would hurt ⸤another person⸥. Instead, speak only what is good so that you can give help wherever it is needed. That way, what you say will help those who hear you” (GW).What is gossip? It's when you share a problem or criticism with someone who is neither part of the problem nor part of the solution. If they're not involved, leave it alone. Preach on this often and remind your leadership regularly. It's that important.4. Teach your church to support church leadership.Hebrews 13:17 says, “Have confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority, because they keep watch over you as those who must give an account. Do this so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no benefit to you” (NIV).That verse should humble every pastor. One day, you will stand before God and give an account of how you shepherded his people. That reality drives us to our knees, praying for wisdom and guidance.With that accountability comes authority. Without authority, you can't be held responsible. God gives pastors authority to lead his church. Teaching your church the biblical basis for leadership authority isn’t about propping yourself up—it’s about protecting the unity that God cherishes.5. Practice God's method of conflict resolution.Jesus outlines the process for handling conflict in Matthew 18: “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along. . . . If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector” (Matthew 18:15-17 NIV).When someone brings you a complaint about another person, your first question should be: Have you talked to them directly? That’s where biblical conflict resolution begins.If they refuse to listen, involve one or two others. If they still won't listen, bring it before the church. And if there's still no repentance, treat them as you would an unbeliever—with love, but with clear boundaries about church membership.Jesus said that unity is a powerful witness to the world. It's not natural for people from different backgrounds to come together as one family. But when churches work together to fulfill God's mission, people notice. Unity attracts.My prayer is that your church will experience the kind of unity that honors God and draws people to the cross.
Walking a Different Path—and Why It’s Worth It

Walking a Different Path—and Why It’s Worth It

“Noah was a righteous man, the only blameless person living on earth at the time, and he walked in close fellowship with God.” Genesis 6:9 (NLT)Pastor, if you want to keep fulfilling your calling—and stay faithful in a world that’s resistant to the gospel—you must be willing to walk a different path than the surrounding culture.That’s not always easy, especially on a Monday morning. Maybe Sunday didn’t go the way you hoped. Maybe you’re wondering if anyone was really listening. Maybe you're tired. But your faithfulness, even in weariness, is exactly what God notices.Noah’s generation was in full rebellion against God. Genesis 6:12 says, “God observed all this corruption in the world, for everyone on earth was corrupt” (NLT). That must have felt incredibly isolating for Noah—yet he stayed the course. The Message paraphrase says it like this: “Noah was different. GOD liked what he saw in Noah” (Genesis 6:8).Let that sink in: God liked what he saw in Noah.Would he say the same of you today? Absolutely. When you preach the Word even when people don’t respond, when you pray over your congregation with love, when you lead with integrity even when it's hard—God sees. And he smiles.You don’t have to be flashy. You don’t have to go viral. You don’t even have to feel effective. Keep doing what God calls you to do. That’s what set Noah apart. He walked with God, even when the rest of the world walked away.As our world moves further from God, pastors like you shine all the brighter. Your steady, faithful ministry matters more than you realize.
Before You Say Yes: 3 Questions Every Pastor Should Ask

Before You Say Yes: 3 Questions Every Pastor Should Ask

“If any of you needs wisdom to know what you should do, you should ask God, and he will give it to you. God is generous to everyone and doesn’t find fault with them.”James 1:5 (GW)You’re likely reading this on a Monday. Yesterday, you poured your heart for your congregation—preaching, shepherding, and leading your people. Now, you’re tired. God wants you to get your proper rest. If you’re burning the candle at both ends, you’re not as bright as you think you are. You’re going to burn out!Every week, you’re probably offered more ministry opportunities than you could take on in a month. That counseling appointment, that community invitation, that extra meeting—they’re all good things. But without wisdom, even good opportunities can become spiritual quicksand.When a new opportunity crosses your desk, take these three steps:Ask, “Is it worth it?” Will this serve the kingdom in the way God has wired you to serve? Is it worth the time, energy, and emotional bandwidth it will cost? Every “yes” is a trade—you’re giving away part of your life for it. Is it worth that kind of exchange?Ask, “What will I have to give up?” Saying “yes” to one thing means saying “no” to something else. Maybe your family. Maybe margin for prayer and reflection. Maybe the deep work God’s been calling you to. Make your “what-matters-most” list before you make your to-do list. Let God shape your priorities before your calendar does.Ask, “Should I just say no?” We’re used to running at the speed of crisis, but constant urgency isn't godly—it’s exhausting. Learning to say “no” is an act of faith. It’s trusting that God can lead your church better than you can. It’s believing your value isn’t in how much you do, but in who you are in Christ. If something isn’t on your “what-matters-most” list, it may be best just to say no.Remember, you don’t need to figure this all out on your own. James 1:5 promises that when we ask for wisdom, God gives it—generously and without shaming us for needing it.So take a breath, pastor. Take your list of opportunities to the Lord. Ask him for wisdom. Then choose what matters most—and rest knowing that obedience is more important than busyness.
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