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Life Transitions Offer the Chance to Connect People

One great way to connect your church into small groups is to focus on life transitions. More than at any other time in our lives, we need people when we’re going through periods of great change. Helping people join small groups during these times provides immediate comfort as well as the potential for years of ongoing support. What transitions should your church use to connect people? Significant events: Take a look at significant events in people’s lives. When you baptize several people at the same time, try to get them together in a small group. After you hold a baby dedication, start a parenting small group. In your premarital counseling process, recommend that young couples join a small group. These events happen all the time in churches. Use them to help people build meaningful relationships. Struggles: Pain motivates people to get connected with other people. No doubt about it. For example, many people are struggling with finances right now. Help them connect with others who are struggling in that area. You can find all sorts of great small group curriculums that deal with finances. Whenever we do a stewardship message at Saddleback, we give people an opportunity to find a small group that is studying what God’s Word teaches about finances. Over the last few years, many men and women across the country have faced the struggle of going off to war. That’s a huge transition. These men and women are leaving their families, leaving their country, and facing death every day. At Saddleback we’ve tried to embrace that transition. We’ve been able to start a few small groups among those leaving for Iraq. These groups get the soldiers connected as they enter into one of the most difficult transitions of their lives. You can also use stage-of-life struggles as an entry door into small groups. For example, we’ve connected groups around single parenting and blended families. Spiritual steps: People are much more willing to join small groups when they are already making other significant spiritual steps. For example, when someone joins your church, they are obviously in a prime position to join a small group. If you have a new member class, make sure you talk about small groups and offer opportunities for people to join them during the class. You can do something similar for members who accept Christ or get baptized. Seasonal beginnings: The calendar will also provide some ideal times for starting new groups. People are more open to adding things to their schedule when a new year starts and when the school year starts, so those are great times to launch new groups. Starts and Stops: Starting up new studies with new curriculum can be a great way to launch new groups, particularly if the new curriculum hits a felt need in your community. New campaigns have always led to our most explosive growth at Saddleback. We started more than 3,000 small groups during 40 Days of Purpose. We started a bunch more with 40 Days of Community. As you’re looking to connect more of your community in small groups, take a look at these different transition periods. God wants all believers to be engaged in authentic community, and often he uses change to see that happen.

Take a look at Steve's book: Small Groups with Purpose: How to Create Healthy Communities

Recent Articles

When God Won’t Let You Look Away

When God Won’t Let You Look Away

“If you put an end to oppression, to every gesture of contempt, and to every evil word; if you give food to the hungry and satisfy those who are in need, then the darkness around you will turn to the brightness of noon.” Isaiah 58:9–10 (GNT)What’s been weighing on you lately? Not the petty stuff. The things you can’t shake.The family that’s one bill away from collapse. The kid who keeps showing up hungry. Or the quiet prejudice that never announces itself—just leaves bruises.This is the “normal" that never should’ve become normal. That kind of holy disturbance might actually be a gift.Esther felt it too. When the threat against her people became real, she was “deeply disturbed” (Esther 4:4 GNT). It didn’t just make her anxious. It pushed her toward a costly step. She prayed. She sought counsel. She chose faithfulness over self-protection. Then she acted.A lot of pastors feel disturbed right now—and tired. You’re writing a sermon, doing a hospital run, trying to make sense of the budget, and your phone still lights up with another crisis text late at night.It’s easy to assume you have to fix everything you notice. You don’t. But you also don’t have to ignore what God has put in front of you.Isaiah 58 describes a life that refuses contempt, refuses oppression, and feeds the hungry. And it ties a promise to that kind of life.When you lean toward justice and mercy, God doesn’t leave you stumbling around in the dark. God guides you. God strengthens you. God supplies what you can’t manufacture on your own.So here’s a simple Monday question to carry into your week:What is one need God is putting within your reach—not so you can save the world, but so you can love your neighbor with integrity?Maybe it’s a conversation you’ve been avoiding. A person you need to see. A practical gift. A small act of advocacy. Or a team you gather so you’re not carrying it alone.Let the disturbance do its work. Then take the next faithful step.
Trusting God When Results Take Time

Trusting God When Results Take Time

“Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways.” (Psalm 37:7 NIV).Pastor, you may not hear the word fret much anymore. It’s an old word that simply means worry. And if there’s one thing ministry can stir up quickly, it’s worry.You worry when things are moving too fast and you’re trying to keep up. You worry when things feel painfully slow and you’re wondering why God hasn’t acted yet. You worry when you look around and it seems like other pastors, other churches, other ministries are succeeding while you’re still waiting.Waiting is hard—especially when you’re responsible for people. But choosing to wait patiently on God instead of fretting is a powerful act of faith. It’s a declaration about who God is. When you wait without worry, you’re saying, “God, I trust your timing more than my pressure.”That’s why Scripture says, “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways” (Psalm 37:7 NIV). God knew comparison would be one of the greatest sources of anxiety for his leaders.One of the fastest ways to drain your joy in ministry is comparison. When you focus on another pastor’s platform, another church’s growth, or another leader’s results, you stop paying attention to what God is doing right in front of you. And comparison always leads to fretting.But God didn’t call you to someone else’s assignment. He didn’t ask you to carry someone else’s results. He asked you to be faithful where you are.Worry won’t help you do that. Worry is worthless. It can’t change yesterday’s sermon. It can’t control next Sunday’s attendance. It can’t speed up God’s process. It only steals today’s peace.That’s why Scripture gives such practical counsel: “Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers” (Philippians 4:6 MSG).Worry never changes anything—but prayer does.So as you step into this week, pastor, resist the urge to rush God or compare yourself to others. Be still. Wait patiently. Trust that God is at work even when progress feels slow.You don’t need to fret this season. You need to pray—and keep walking faithfully in the calling God has already placed on your life.
How to Cooperate as God Works in You

How to Cooperate as God Works in You

Pastor, you want to see fruit—in your life and in the people and ministry of your church. The Bible calls that “the fruit of the Spirit”—“love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galatians 5:22–23 NIV).These nine qualities describe the character of a mature disciple and the kind of leader you’re becoming.So how does God grow this fruit in you? He uses a process. Here are two facts you need to know if you want to cooperate with that process.1) Spiritual growth is a partnership.Paul writes, “Work out your salvation . . . for it is God who works in you” (Philippians 2:12–13 NIV).That’s not a contradiction—it’s a paradox. You don’t work for your salvation. You work out what God has already put in. In a physical workout you develop muscles you already have; in a spiritual workout you cultivate the new life God has already given you.God has a part in your growth, and you have a part. He provides the power—but you need to flip the switch. Your job is to cooperate with what he’s doing.2) Spiritual fruit ripens over time.There’s no such thing as instant spiritual maturity. It takes time for fruit to ripen—and when you try to rush fruit, you ruin the flavor. The same is true in ministry. You can accelerate activity, but you can’t microwave character. God grows fruit season by season.How to Cooperate with the Spirit’s Growth ProcessImmerse yourself in Scripture. Read, study, memorize, and meditate so God’s Word reshapes your thinking.Pray honestly. Talk with God about everything you’re facing. Invite the Spirit to search you and lead you.Surrender daily. Give the Holy Spirit free rein—no compartments and no conditions.Receive your circumstances. Trust that God is using both pleasant and painful seasons to form Christlike character.Respond like Jesus. Ask, “What would Christ’s love, patience, or gentleness look like right here?” Then do it.God wants to produce the fruit of the Spirit in your life and leadership. Will you cooperate with him in this life-changing process?
Tell God How You’re Feeling

Tell God How You’re Feeling

“[God] has made my skin and flesh grow old. He has broken my bones. He has besieged and surrounded me with anguish and distress. He has buried me in a dark place, like those long dead. . . . And though I cry and shout, he has shut out my prayers.” Lamentations 3:4–6, 8 (NLT)If you’ve been in ministry long enough, you know what it feels like to be poured out and still feel empty. The sermon is preached. The hospital visits are made. The hard conversations are had. And yet, sometimes, instead of joy or peace, all that remains is silence—and sadness.Maybe it’s a critical email after a long Sunday. Maybe it’s watching your church shrink despite your best efforts. Maybe it’s conflict in your leadership team, or the quiet ache of seeing people walk away from the faith. And in those moments, you wonder, Where is God in this?Jeremiah knew that feeling well. In Lamentations, he’s not giving a neat theological answer—he’s groaning. He says, “[God] has made my skin and flesh grow old. He has broken my bones. . . . And though I cry and shout, he has shut out my prayers” (Lamentations 3:4, 8 NLT).Sound familiar?It might surprise you that such raw emotion is in the Bible—but it’s there for a reason. Jeremiah didn’t bottle it up or try to sound strong. He didn’t pretend everything was okay. He poured it all out before God.Pastor, you don’t have to stuff your emotions either.God isn’t intimidated by your questions. He doesn’t flinch when you’re angry, exhausted, or confused. You’re not less spiritual for being honest—you’re actually stepping into a kind of worship that leads to healing.If you try to keep all that pain inside, it will find its way out—maybe through anxiety, resentment, even burnout. But when you give it to God—every ounce of frustration, fear, and fatigue—you start to find space to breathe again.God doesn't need you to be strong for him. He already knows your heart. So tell him the truth. Not the polished version. The real one.He can handle it.And more importantly, he’s not going anywhere.
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