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Discipleship Is All About Growing Up to Be Like Christ

40 Days of Prayer Study Kit

40 Days of Love

Daily Hope Devotional: 365 Days of Purpose, Peace, and Promise

God wants you to grow up.

"God wants us to grow up, to know the whole truth and tell it in love - like Christ in everything" (Ephesians 4:15 The Message).

"We are not meant to remain as children ...." (Ephesians 4:14 Phillips).

Your heavenly Father’s goal is for you to mature and develop the characteristics of Jesus Christ, living a life of love and humble service. Sadly, millions of Christians grow older but never grow up. They are stuck in perpetual spiritual infancy, remaining in diapers and booties. The reason is because they never intended to grow. Spiritual growth is not automatic. It takes an intentional commitment. You must want to grow, decide to grow, make an effort to grow, and persist in growing. Discipleship - the process of becoming like Christ - always begins with a decision.

"As Jesus passed on from there, he saw a man called Matthew sitting at the tax booth, and he said to him, 'Follow me.' And he rose and followed him" (Matthew 9:9 ESV).

When the first disciples chose to follow Jesus, they didn’t understand all the implications of their decision. They simply responded to Jesus’ invitation. That’s all you need to get started: decide to become a disciple. Nothing shapes your life more than the commitments you choose to make. Your commitments can develop you or they can destroy you, but either way, they will define you. Tell me what you are committed to, and I’ll tell you what you’ll be in 20 years. We become whatever we are committed to. It is at this point of commitment that most people miss God’s purpose for their lives. Many are afraid to commit to anything and just drift through life. Others make half-hearted commitments to competing values, which leads to frustration and mediocrity. Others make a full commitment to worldly goals, such as becoming wealthy or famous, and end up disappointed and bitter. Every choice has eternal consequences, so you’d better choose wisely.

"Since everything around us is going to melt away, what holy, godly lives you should be living!" (2 Peter 3:11 NLT).

Christlikeness comes from making Christlike commitments. You must commit to living the rest of your life for the five purposes God made. Jesus summarized these purposes in the Great Commandment and the Great Commission.

A great commitment to the Great Commandment and the Great Commission will make you a great Christian.

Once you decide to get serious about becoming like Christ, you must begin to act in new ways. You’ll need to let go of some old routines, develop some new habits, and intentionally change the way you think.

"Continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose" (Philippians 2:12 NIV).

This verse shows the two parts of spiritual growth: "work out" and "work in." The "work out" is your responsibility and the "work in" is God’s role. Spiritual growth is a collaborative effort between you and the Holy Spirit. God’s Spirit works with us, not just in us. This verse, written to believers, is not about how to be saved, but how to grow. It does not say "work for" your salvation, because you can’t add anything to what Jesus already did! During a physical workout, you exercise to develop your body, not to get a body. When you "work out" a puzzle, you already have all the pieces - your task is to put it together. Farmers work the land, not to get land, but to develop what they already have. God has given you a new life; now you are responsible to develop it "with fear and trembling." That is to take your spiritual growth seriously, because it will determine your role in eternity. When people are casual about their growth in Christlikeness, it shows they don’t understand the implications. To change your life, you must change the way you think. Behind everything you do is a thought. Every behavior is motivated by a belief, and every action is prompted by an attitude. God revealed this thousands of years before psychologists understood it:

"Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts" (Proverbs 4:23 GNT).

Imagine riding in a speedboat on a lake with an automatic pilot set to go east. If you decide to reverse and head west, you have two possible ways to change the boat’s direction. One way is to grab the steering wheel and physically force it to head in the opposite direction that the autopilot is programmed to go. By sheer willpower, you could overcome the autopilot, but you’d feel constant resistance. Your arms would eventually tire of the stress, you’d let go of the steering wheel, and the boat would instantly head back east, the way it was internally programmed. This is what happens when you try to change your life with willpower: You say "I’ll force myself to eat less. . .stop smoking. . .quit being disorganized and late." Yes, willpower can produce short-term change, but it creates constant internal stress because you haven’t dealt with the root cause. The change doesn’t feel natural. Eventually you give up, and go off the diet. There is a better and easier way: Change your autopilot - the way you think.

"Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think" (Romans 12:2 NLT).

Your first step in spiritual growth is to start changing the way you think. Change always starts first in your mind. The way you think determines the way you feel, and the way you feel influences the way you act.

"Let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes" (Ephesians 4:23 NLT).

To be like Christ you must develop the mind of Christ. The New Testament calls this mental shift "repentance," which in Greek literally means "to change your mind." To repent means to change the way you think - about God, yourself, sin, other people, life, your future, and everything else. You adopt Christ’s outlook and perspective on life.

"In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus" (Philippians 2:5 NIV).

There are two parts to thinking like Jesus. The first half of this mental shift is to stop thinking immature thoughts, which are self-centered and self-seeking. Babies, by nature, are completely selfish. They think only of themselves. That is immature thinking.

"Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things" (Romans 8:5 NLT).

"Stop thinking like children. In regard to evil be infants, but in your thinking be adults" (1 Corinthians 14:20 NIV).

The second half of thinking like Jesus is to start thinking maturely, which focuses on others, not yourself. In his great chapter on what real love is, Paul concluded that thinking of others is the mark of maturity: "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me" (1 Corinthians 13:11 NIV). Today, many assume that spiritual maturity is measured by how much biblical knowledge and doctrine you know. While knowledge is one measurement of maturity, it isn’t the whole story. The Christian life is far more than creeds and convictions; it includes conduct and character. Our deeds must be consistent with our creeds and our beliefs must be backed up with Christlike behavior. Christianity is not a philosophy, but a relationship and a life, where we practice thinking of others as Jesus did:

"We should think of their good and try to help them by doing what pleases them" (Romans 15:2 CEV).

Don't be selfish; don't try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don't look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too" (Philippians 2:3-4 NLT).

Thinking of others is the heart of Christlikeness and the goal of spiritual growth. This kind of thinking is unnatural, countercultural, and rare. The only way we will learn to think this way is by filling our minds with the Word of God.

Recent Articles

Are You Focused on the Immediate or the Eternal?

As a pastor, you deal with many immediate needs every day—from counseling issues to leadership concerns to preparing your regular weekend messages. And added to that, we’re in the middle of an election year, when everyone is fighting for our attention.  It’s easy to get caught up in the here and now. But faithful ministry in our world today that impacts our communities requires something else. Every pastor needs to keep an eternal perspective.  Keeping an eternal perspective means realizing there’s more to life than just here and now. C.S. Lewis once said, “All that is not eternal is eternally out of date.” You’re in an eternal struggle for the hearts and souls of people in your community. Nothing matters more than that struggle.  An eternal perspective realizes there are long-term implications for every action we take. Pastors who make a difference in the world around them focus on those eternal implications rather than the immediate ones. At the most, you’ll only live on earth for a mere 90 or so years, but your time in eternity will never end. Your ministry on this side of eternity is simply a prelude to the real thing.  Noah understood this. The Bible tells us, “[Noah] was the only truly righteous man living on the earth at that time. He tried always to conduct his affairs according to God’s will” (Genesis 6:9 TLB). Noah was single-focused, always asking, “What does God want me to do?” That’s what an eternally focused life looks like. Noah had a filter. Each decision he made was guided by God’s will.  Hebrews 13:14 captures what it means to be eternally minded: “For this world is not our home; we are looking forward to our everlasting home in heaven” (TLB). If you believe and base your ministry on that truth, it will change everything for you and your church. Suddenly, yesterday’s contentious business meeting and your church’s budget failings won’t matter nearly as much.  Your focus will be on what doesn’t change—helping people to worship the Lord, build Jesus-honoring relationships, become more like Jesus, serve God faithfully, and tell others about Jesus.   A ministry with an eternal perspective focuses on the purposes of God, which never change. That’s why I wrote in The Purpose Driven Church: “Unless the driving force behind a church is biblical, the health and growth of the church will never be what God intended. Strong churches are not built on programs, personalities, or gimmicks. They are built on the eternal purposes of God.” Programs, personalities, and gimmicks might produce short-term ministry success, but the results of pursuing God’s purposes last forever. When you have an eternal perspective on your ministry, you realize the most important areas of your work can’t be easily seen. Paul says, “We set our eyes not on what we see but on what we cannot see. What we see will last only a short time, but what we cannot see will last forever” (2 Corinthians 4:18 NCV). A thousand years from now, our church buildings will be nothing but piles of rubble. Our budgets and our strategies won’t matter at all. What really counts is the lasting impact we’ve had on people who will worship Jesus for all of eternity.  If you truly understand this perspective, you won’t need to stress over the ebbs and flows of your ministry week. The headlines won’t depress you each morning. Your church’s budget shortfalls won’t cause you concern.  Instead, as you focus on what God’s Word says about eternal issues that matter most, you’ll be free to make a difference with your ministry. Remember the words of Proverbs 19:21: “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails” (NIV). If you are building a ministry on God’s eternal purposes, you can’t fail. God’s purposes will always prevail.

Three Ways to Grow While You Wait

God wants to do something incredible through your ministry. No one can take that away. Your critics can’t. Neither can Satan. But that doesn’t mean you won’t have to wait for it. Sometimes God cracks a door and lets you see your future before you’re ready to walk through it. Why does he do that? First, if God showed you all your future at once,it would scare you. You’d take one look and say, “Oh no, God wants me to do that?” You’re simply not ready right now to see everything God wants to do through you. God also wants to keep you close to him as you trust him to do what he is calling you to do. It’s like he writes his plan for you on a scroll. You unroll the scroll a bit and do what he says. Then you unroll a bit more, and he gives you a little more of the vision. You’re not the first leader God has let glimpse the future long before it’s become reality. In fact, he has done that over and over again throughout history. Centuries ago, God gave Habakkuk a vision for Israel and then told him: “But these things I plan won’t happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, do not despair, for these things will surely come to pass. Just be patient! They will not be overdue a single day!” (Habakkuk 2:3 TLB). God wasn’t late for Habakkuk. He won’t be overdue when it comes to his vision for your life either. God’s timing is perfect. God is always at work, lining up everything according to his plan. God can do more in five minutes on his timing, than you can do in 50 years on yours. While you wait, God has something important for you to do. You're supposed to be preparing by learning. So what do you need to learn while you’re waiting on God’s vision for your life to be fulfilled? Learn discernment. You need to learn which doors to walk through and which ones to walk past so you can avoid wasting time, money, and energy as you pursue God’s vision for your ministry. Paul writes to the church of Philippi: “This is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ” (Philippians 1:9-10 NIV). God wants you to grow in your love for others, but he wants you to do that with both knowledge and discernment so you’ll make the right choices about the doors he puts in front of you. Learn courage. You may already know the right choices to make about the doors God has placed before you, but you need to grow in your courage. You don’t have the faith right now to take the right step. Pastor, it’s not enough to know what to do. You need the courage to actually do what the Lord is calling you to do. Courage isn’t the absence of fear. It’s stepping out in faith despite your fear. When Solomon received the assignment of building the temple, David gave him some advice:“Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Don’t be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord God, my God, is with you. He won’t leave you or abandon you until all the work for the service of the Lord’s house is finished” (1 Chronicles 28:20 CSB). I’ve been scared about every single important decision in my life, but I decided long ago not to let fear dominate my life. So I have constantly acted contrary to my fear. God doesn’t sponsor flops. If he gives you the vision, you have nothing to worry about. Learn to open doors for others. Waiting isn’t easy. When you have a glimpse of something God wants to do through your life, you want it now. But you’re not the only one waiting. Look around in your ministry, and you’ll see other people waiting for their own open doors. Often, they will have doors in front of them you can help open. As often as you can, learn to open those doors. Love other people. Care about how God will use them. God will put people in your life to do the same for you. Don’t waste your waiting time. Let God help you grow into the leader he wants you to be on the other side of the door.

6 Ways Leaders Need to Show Discipline

Great leaders have at least one common denominator: personal discipline. Take the Apostle Paul as an example. He had tremendous self-control. He talks about it in this passage: “Don’t you realize that everyone who runs in a race runs to win, but only one runner gets the prize? Run like them, so that you can win. Everyone who enters an athletic contest goes into strict training. They do it to win a temporary crown, but we do it to win one that will be permanent” (1 Corinthians 9:24-25 GW). Paul wanted to be successful and understood he couldn’t live haphazardly and accomplish what God called him to do. He showed self-discipline throughout his ministry, and so should we. Here are six specific areas of our lives where leaders need to show self-discipline. Their mood: Most great things in the world are achieved by those who don’t feel like doing them. The Bible says, “A man without self-control is as defenseless as a city with broken-down walls” (Proverb 25:28 TLB). Without discipline, you’re at the mercy of your moods. You’re without defense and a helpless victim of your emotions. Their words: Proverbs 13:3 says, “Whoever controls his mouth protects his own life. Whoever has a big mouth comes to ruin” (GW). Leaders who say the wrong things at the wrong time can expect problems. Their reactions: The Bible says, “If you are sensible, you will control your temper. When someone wrongs you, it is a great virtue to ignore it” (Proverbs 19:11 GNT). Leaders don’t fly off the handle even when provoked. When you get angry because of someone else, you’re letting that person have control over you. A disciplined person acts rather than reacts. Their schedule: We all have the same amount of time—168 hours a week. But leaders know how to use their time effectively. Ephesians 5:15-16 says, “Live life, then, with a due sense of responsibility . . . Make the best use of your time” (PHILLIPS). Discipline is the reason some people get more done than others. You don’t have time to do everything as a leader, so you need to schedule your priorities. If you don’t decide how you’ll spend your time, others will decide for you. Their money: Leaders must live within their means. The way you manage the resources God gives you is a glimpse into how you’ll manage the resources of others. Luke 16:10 says, “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with a lot. Whoever is dishonest with very little is dishonest with a lot” (GW). Their health: For many of us, our bodies need more exercise, more rest, and fewer calories. Proverbs 23:2 says, “If you have a big appetite, restrain yourself” (GNT). Leadership is a marathon. If you want to go the distance, treat your body with respect. The rewards of a disciplined life go well beyond your ministry. You’ll have less stress and less debt, and you’ll live longer. But most importantly, you’ll be more ready to be used by God. The disciplines you establish today will determine your future.

The Fallacy of One-Size-Fits-All Discipleship

You can mass produce many things—cars, furniture, plastic bottles, etc.—but you can’t mass produce disciples. One-size-fits-all simply doesn’t work when you’re trying to help people become more like Jesus. God wired each of us with a unique SHAPE. The Bible says, “You shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb” (Psalm 139:13 MSG). Our creator specially designed each and every one of us. The unique ways God made us affect everything about us—including how we fulfill God’s purposes. SHAPE is an acrostic that describes our uniqueness. God gave us Spiritual gifts, Heart (passions), Abilities, Personality, and Experiences. No one else in the world has the same mix of those five attributes as you do. A person’s God-given SHAPE helps them identify where they can best serve the body of Christ. But our uniqueness is about much more than how we serve. In fact, our SHAPE affects how we worship, fellowship, evangelize—and how we grow. There’s a myth that maturity is measured by how much Bible knowledge you have. Of course, that’s a factor in maturity, but it’s not the only one. We all know someone who’s a veritable storehouse of Bible knowledge yet is just downright mean. God’s Word hasn’t made it into their character. If maturity was just about learning as much of the Bible as possible, then we might all grow in the same ways. But people grow differently. Some people learn by listening. If they hear it, they get it. Others learn through reading. Still, others grow best when they’re discussing truth with other believers. We also know that many people grow by rolling up their sleeves and getting to work. Don’t give them the latest book on prayer; pray with them. Give them opportunities to serve. That’s how they grow. The problem is that most of our churches only teach in one way. They expect everyone to grow through listening to someone talk. Auditory learners love that. But not everyone is an auditory learner. It’s no accident that most churches have more women in discussion groups than men. Many women like to discuss. Many men like to act. They’re ready for action. There’s nothing wrong with either of those preferences. It’s how God wired them. So, as you build a discipleship program in your church, you have to understand that the best way to help the most people grow is through multiple reinforcements. That’s why I strongly believe in spiritual-growth campaigns. These short-term campaigns have multiple components, such as devotional reading, small group discussion, memory verses, ministry projects, and more. You teach the same truth through hearing it, reading it, talking about it, discussing it, doing it, and memorizing it. You do it all at once. If you’re not using spiritual growth campaigns, I recommend giving it a try. As you engage them in different ways, you’ll see people who have stalled spiritually for years start growing. Throughout the years at Saddleback, we’ve used several tools to help people grow through the unique ways God wired them. For example, SHAPE interviews help our members discover their God-given design so they can find ministry fits in the church. Not only does this get people connected to ministries, but it also helps them find out more about themselves so they can grow according to their SHAPE. Another tool we’ve used is a spiritual health assessment, where you can evaluate your growth progress. The Bible tells us to examine ourselves. This tool gives people a tangible way to look into their spiritual lives. We’ve found this tool helps just about everyone, but it’s particularly good for those God wired to be more introspective. Also, to help people who particularly enjoy being in nature, we created a prayer garden, where they can go to pray after every service. But the tools aren’t as important as the principle. You can’t make cookie-cutter disciples. Though we all go through a discipleship process, everyone grows in different ways and at different rates. Look for ways to expand the opportunities for people to grow in the unique ways God has wired them.